To say that Kelly Brook has some of the best boobs on the planet is really kind of an understatement. Kelly Brook's breasts are the stuff dreams are made of. So, it's not surprising that when your boobs are that great, you also have fantastic cleavage, sideboob, and underboob. And even though I just made it up, Kelly Brook is the winner of Underboob of the Year!
Mars, the red planet and our closet neighbor, has always been such a mystery to us. There is now talk of sending people to Mars to live. Honestly, you couldn't pay me enough money to move to Mars. There are no restaurants, Amazon Prime isn't a thing there, and there is no topless Mars on Mars.
If you grew up like me, then good table manners were instilled in you by any means necessary. Now as an adult, there is nothing worse than sitting at a table across from someone who is a messy eater. There is no excuse for not having proper table manners and creating without covering your face in food. Well, there's one excuse; if you're a topless Claudia Thompson, you totally get a pass.
It's not that I'm at a loss for words about Jasmine Alleva and her incredible body. In fact, I would say it's the opposite. My mind is filled with hundreds if not thousands, they just all happen to mean the same damn thing: Jasmine Alleva is hella hot.
Arrr, mateys - a few days ago we all celebrated the wonderful holiday: Talk Like a Pirate Day! There's no doubt you all called your friends and family members scally-wags, demanded plank walking, and spent all day talking about booty! Well, I know I did, and I didn't care about the strange looks my one eye not covered by an eye patch was getting. Since pirates are so awesome, what better way to celebrate than with some real booty! Let's countdown the Top Ten Hottest Celebrity Pirates!
We all know that Ana de Armas is hot. She is so hot that many of us can simply close our eyes and describe her hotness from memory. But that doesn't mean she needs to cover up! Come on, Ana De Armas don't wear so much! It's not sweater weather!
Paris Jackson is not related to Madonna. That's what the world keeps telling us. Yet almost every single time I lay eyes on her, she looks like the spitting image of Madonna. That's not a bad thing, but it's starting to become kind of confusing.
I know that it's important not to live your life constantly thinking about all the things that are unfair. And while we each define what is and isn't fair differently, there are few things that I think we can all agree are unfair. Seeing a jerk get promoted, unfair. Someone cutting in line when they clearly see you, unfair. The fact that Eva Longoria has never done a nude scene - the most unfair ever.
As we all know, Kim Kardashian West has a black belt in Instagram. She has millions upon millions of followers (I count myself as one) who wait with baited breath for each new bikini. While this new bikini post is sexy, I have to ask; did Kim KW draw those bikinis on?
We all remember where we were when we first saw that trailer for Starship Troopers (1997). I couldn't have been more excited. I still fondly remember seeing that movie and not understanding why everyone was all about Casper Van Dien, but my god, I loved that movie. Still do love it to this day. How could you not love Dina Meyer in the shower?
In my honest opinion one of the most underrated Ernest film is Ernest Goes to Jail. It's full of laughs and a wonderful message about how horrible jail can be. And as much I believe it's an American classic if they wanted to do a remake or continue the Ernest story with his daughter or something, it would be awesome if they picked Miley Cyrus to star. Of course if they made it nude jail it would be even more awesome.
In my column Only in Florida, I'll be taking you down to the Sunshine State for the latest and greatest sex stories that can only be found in the craziest state in the union.
There is no doubt that Olivia Munn is hot. She has been and probably will continue to be one of the hottest hotties around. She is without a doubt someone we all wish would do another (and longer) topless scene. Recently I've noticed that whenever a new Olivia Munn pic rolls across my desk there's something about it, about her... is it that Olivia Munn has become way too hot?
I'll be the first admit I know very little about fashion, especially new trends in... well, everything. So, personally I have no idea what Genevieve Morton is wearing, but damn it, it's sexy as hell. Is it like a ladies jock strap? Are those a thing?
I don't know where Jenna Dewan Tatum is, but if her location was lacking in tourism then I hope the city government follows her on Instagram because this cheek filled pic would one hell of a tourism poster. If you want talk about great views, they get no greater than Jenna Dewan Tatum in a thong.
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